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Recent Movie Reviews

Messed-Up Bible Stories11 Messed-Up Bible Stories11

Rated 4.5 / 5 stars

That was brilliant. Though I believe the jokes didn't hit as hard as the first three Messed Up Bible Stories, I still had a few laughs here and there as well as a couple of smiles. While I know this is about Bible stories (from your title, of course), I was wondering if you would include the actual life story of Jesus? I must admit, I am curious on how you would approach the whole crucifixion of Jesus subject, as it would be extremely controversial. Will you be able to pull that off, I wonder. o.O

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Samination responds:

I'm trying to do the stories in chronological order and the story of Jesus is something I want to do, but its light years away.

Incident:009b RE Incident:009b RE

Rated 5 / 5 stars

Wow, this literally blew my brains out! XD Shame it had to be Deimos. Why him and not Sanford or Hank?

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GabrielBarsch responds:

because sanford and hank are alot better than him

Mario and the Penguin Mario and the Penguin

Rated 3 / 5 stars

Yes, I did drop the baby penguin. Both of them, the real and fake. It was hilarious.

I think, like some other people, you took too long to get to the punch line and stretched out the animation unnecessarily by using a bit of filler scenes. The animation was enjoyable, decent, but a tad bit sketchy that could be improved a bit. And the video did lose a bit of relevance as Super Mario 64 came out like 15 years ago and it feels like you're trying to flog a dead horse or revive a dead subject.

On the good side, it was a pretty good angle to do a joke. And the music and sounds were intact and were on que, so I guess I have to give you some credit. The animation was decent. And it was pretty nostalgic to see some animations about Mario.

And the dramatic effect of Mario getting revenge kind of made the joke less funny. It would probably have been funnier if Mario gave the mother back her baby and then immediately took it away from her with an XD face and then threw the penguin off the cliff. Then proceed to take the fake penguin and throw it off the cliff, too. And finally, Mario gets the star and does a happy dance.

Good effort!

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Recent Game Reviews

Simgirls (Full Version) Simgirls (Full Version)

Rated 4.5 / 5 stars

I've been following this game ever since the first version of this game came out ten years ago. And I've been following your progress and ups and down since then and in all honesty, like many other great works that had on and offs in motivations, I thought this would be another abandoned half-completed great wonder for us to wait for in all eternity. But you completed it - you were a man of your word and you finished what you started. For that, I respect you. That is not something I say lightly.

The game has come a long way from the simple one-ending, one-girl game that this originated from. Now there are 5 different endings and and even more girls to choose from. You have added a lot of relatively fun and classic side games like fighting and racing. One of my favorites was the modeling side game. While the graphics are not exactly first class, I didn't exactly expect it to be first class save for the adult scenes. It is only a sim after all. Imagination, interactivity with the characters, and the simulation world as well as the amazing hentai scenes is what made this game enjoyable and famous. With that being said, there are a few parts I want to review and analyze to you in detail:

Characters: I like the wide selectivity of girls to select from and date. Their interactions with you the different scenarios resulting from different choices was fun. I enjoy how there is a shy girl, a popular girl, two weird girls (being Karin and Sana), your childhood friend, and your teacher to choose from. That being said, while some characters were really well-developed, like Tomoko (obviously, who was your first character anyway. I give her part 5 stars out of 5. No qualms there), other characters were honestly a bit sloppy. Kotomi was the 2nd most well developed character and I was expecting a more in-depth background about her other than her being a dancer who had flatulence problems and was going to Germany. For example, Tomoko is obviously insecure and has a broken family and trust problems and you even involved her family in it. Kotomi had no such thing. Ami is even worse. You have practically NO development with her and figure out nothing or her personal background until the end. Her only saving grace was the ending, but even that was ruined by Karin (see "ending next). That being said, she is practically the only and most loyal girl to you and I like her. Perhaps that's why I was most affected. Karin's character development was a bit better with her unique background from being in the future. While I understand this is a hentai game, this is also a DATING simulation where feelings and understanding the girl is just as important, which is why you also made a romantic, non-hentai ending for Tomoko, I presume.

Endings: This is another part I want to expand on. Tomoko's part was great! You made two endings for her and it was very well thought out! I liked how you drew out parallels in both hentai and innocent. Kotomi, Ami, and Karin's endings mingled with each other and I honestly did not like that. I preferred that you either did not involve other girls in it or have an option/ending for only one girl to be involved. I think you shared some scenes between characters because you were just being lazy. Ami's original ending from the previous version was very sad and romantic. It involved her and only her and made it a lot more personal and in-depth. I loved it! It was my favorite ending and I honestly did not know why you decided to change it to involve the other girls. Karin's ending was well-thought out I admit and Kotomi's ending was more romantic than Hentai. If you want to give Tomoko a hentai and innocent ending, you should have probably added one for Kotomi soon.

I think I ranted enough. While I may sound harsh, I DID give this a near full rating. I know that you were in a rush to complete the game and it made this game have a lot of holes. But it's still a timeless classic for new artists to learn after! Props to you for an amazing game! I really look forward to Simgirls 2! Don't take 10 years this time, though!

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sim-man responds:

Great review. Yes I can't spend another few years to further develop this free game and I really need to move on to SG2 (don't worry it will be a full-time project, if I can get investors, or I won't start it at all). I rushed to finish the game so I could only fully developed Tomoko and leave other girls as supporting characters. I think Tomoko is a challenge/fun for me because I like to give some depths to a typical pornstar-like character who usually dies first in horror movies.

I agree with most of your points. I just want to defend Ami's ending a bit. According to the game story the player pays very little attention to Ami during the course of the game, so somehow I want to show the sudden change of heart at the end. It makes more sense to me but I can see how Ami's fans want a more "complete" experience with her. I will keep this in mind and for SG2, I will make sure all girls enjoy the same level of attentions from SimMan lol!!

Epic Battle Fantasy 3 Epic Battle Fantasy 3

Rated 5 / 5 stars

Stuff to think about... and a review

To tell you the truth, I think it's ridiculously generous that you're giving the general population a game of this caliber for free, an outstanding game hand-drawn and custom-made by something like this should be sold not distributed freely. But because of how the sheer amount of effort, the sheer greatness of the game, and how much you've developed the game from the first Epic Battle Fantasy will not let my conscience freely give you anything less than a 10.

That being said, because you announced on your facebook and deviant-art page that you're making a 4 and 5, there are quite a few things that I would suggest that I would like you to note.

1. What to keep:

I love the humor and conversations that parody other video games, like how you made fun of breaking into NPC houses and stealing their stuff, the "Oh no a puzzle area, we're too stupid to figure this out", etc. Keep that. And you can expand on it, too. This is one of areas of expertise that I really love.

Keep the personality of the main characters and developing them.

Keep your imagination of the characters, the world, the setting and the plot. Keep up the effort and keep up the good work.

Keep the music artist or at least music from a musician the same level. Phyrnna (HalcyonicFalconX) is on par with your own talent in terms of music. I'm seriously going to buy a soundtrack from her after I pay off my medical school debt. (Stupid debt).

2. What to change:

Well... you've kept most of the moves from the previous two epic battle fantasies. Not saying it's a bad thing, but maybe you can consider thinking of completely new ones instead of making like... 80% of them the same?

3. What I suggest:

Separating the characters and letting us find them one by one: For example, there's a new threat to the world, and one blast blows up the entire land that sends Matt, Natalie, Lance (and whatever new character you may add) flying to different lands. They get separated into different places and you get to find them one by one. Not only does it allow players the excitement of uncovering and finding old characters along the way, it allows you the chance to mysteriously introduce new characters AND allows you the appreciate how special each and unique characters are. (For example, we get to appreciate how important Natalie's heal, or Lance's support attacks are).

Automated and Summoned Battle Characters: Lance conquered the world. And there are only three slots (one main character each). If bosses are allowed five slots, then why don't you let Lance summon say... super soldiers to fight alongside of them? Until they either die, run out of magic, or just last 10 turns or so. I'm also disappointed you didn't allow any of the characters to summon a dragon or a mythical creature like that (though cats are amazing, I'd like to see some more of what epic moves you can make).

Perhaps upgradable speed? You may want to consider adding speed as a stat, so that faster characters can use multiple moves in a single turn. That would be epic (more epic than your already epic game, of course).

Adding a sky setting? I've always wanted to see how you'll draw a battle on a sky or a flying ship (where the background is moving and the wind is blowing).

4. What to develop on:

Quests: You may want to expand on quests. I know they're annoying to some players, but they are also extremely crucial to having a fun time and are part of an RPG. You may want to consider making some of the quests much more complex.

Plot: You may want to consider a more complex plot. I love your style and I expect more twists, more turns, and much more storyline.

Art: Your art is already beyond what I can describe in words and gone into the realm of the Gods. But even I, a mere mortal, can see that you've only unleashed 30% of your full potential. You've got a whole life ahead of you. I want to see the limits of your talent. And yes you have talent. Natural born talent that only one in every ten million people may have. (I'm not exaggerating).

Keep up the good work, man! And... I'm out of words....

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LARRY: Doug-Out LARRY: Doug-Out

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

Ugh...I think you could seriously have done better

Hey man. Thought the first Larry game would be about Larry, but I suppose it could be about any character from Karryon. Not disappointed, but rather surprised, mate.

The animation in itself is wonderful and so was the voice acting. The music is wonderful to listen to and the sound was also pretty nice. The concept was pretty simple, but addicting. Now, while the game does have a good potential, there are some annoying issues.

What most people and I dislike most about the game (and hence the 3.9 score) is the imbalance of the game. The game speeds up too fast and the cash flow is much too low. And there are quite a glitches that are very annoying.

For example, to counter Doug stealing your ale, you have to hit him more and more times per level. However, as you spend most of your time beating him bloody, you waste time and when you upgrade to, say, the 200 dollars weapon, it's near if not impossible to get the 500 dollars weapon. And if you spend the first few rounds upgrading quality, you increase the cash flow, but not by enough. I'd suggest upping the cash you get from increasing quality and increase it by a much larger scale.

Another thing about Doug would be how you click on him and it takes 5 clicks to get McSweeny to hit him. I would increase the area effect in which your click would allow you to hit him.

So, aside from those, what else could be done? Well to start with, helpers would be nice. Assistants (sort of like auto turrets in shooting games) for examle could help balance the game. They could give you a steady cash flow while you beat the fuck out of Doug or body guards that could screen out parts of Doug. And having the option to kill Doug would also be really satisfying, but I suppose that'll defeat the purpose of the game.

Upgrades on walking speed would also be nice. He takes a really long time to get to the back that before you hit Doug, he'll have taken a sip. A person wanting to send Doug flying would probably run there instead of leisurely walking there.

And slow down on the difficulty scales. Instead of being linear like what it should be, it reaches exponential explosion in which our adapation could not keep up with the increase difficulty.

So far, because of the imbalances, there are a few medals that most people agree would be literally impossible to achieve: the 2000 dollar medal, beat a level without Doug stealing Ale after level 5, and the full upgrades medals. As mentioned before, the frustration from playing the game will cause people to vote low. And it's something that you can change by tweening it a bit to make it more suitable for us.

If not, then at least make 3 difficulties: Easy, normal, and hard. That could help us adapt and potentially up the score by a bit.

I hope you're not disappointed by the score. It's not that we don't hate the game, it's just that we're frustrated to the point that click on 0 to get revenge for the fact that we can't get the medals we want.

Another thing that probably doesn't have to do with the game balance is probably giving us an ending. Many (probably most) hate games with infinite levels because it NEVER ENDS, and you assume that we eventually meet an end because we can't keep up. But what we hope for is an ending scene or at least a message for a goal to look forward to.

Sorry man, just a bit frustrated like everyone else that I probably ended up ranting. Looking forward to Larry 2 and the other games. Take into account our suggestions and hopefully everything will work out.

Still your bud and fan,

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Recent Audio Reviews

Children's Overture Children's Overture

Rated 4.5 / 5 stars

In short, this is a hasty masterpiece that was perhaps a bit rushed in my opinion. When I heard the opening, it threw my imagination into a world of excitement and unlimited opportunities, and then from then on, it just rushed. I can feel the emotions and wonder and innocence, but it was perhaps too short. But then again, you did explain that you didn't have time as you were rushing it in for an entry into the Newgrounds Audio Deathmatch 2012.

I definitely can't wait to hear the full version of this song!!!

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BlazingDragon responds:

I had two weeks to compose a piece for the contest but didn't have any ideas that I particularly wanted to stick with. The second to last day before the deadline, I went out and bought 24GB of RAM for my computer and found that I could finally run a full orchestra without my computer crapping out. Improving on my MIDI controller with a staccato clarinet sound, I played with main motif of this piece and felt so inspired that I stayed up until 2:00 AM composing. I was gone much of the next day about only had five more hours available to put it.

My desire was to make this piece much longer and smartly paced. I even brainstormed ideas while I was out during the day and wrote down the entire song structure I planned, but once I got home and started working, I realized there was no way the whole idea could be realized in such a short time frame. I rushed like crazy and ended up posting this three minutes before the deadline. There are several things that I'd like to change, but I'm still very happy with the result.

Thank you for taking the time to review! Hopefully I'll do this piece some justice sometime within the next two months.

Rainbows and Unicorns ~P~ Rainbows and Unicorns ~P~

Rated 5 / 5 stars

This song is the definitely heart of Adventure Story, and you made it so. You made it upbeat, fun, happy, and full of adventure. I definitely appreciate your skills and efforts as a music artist and would say that I would definitely love to hear more of them. Every one of your songs, whether it's adapted or original is a beautiful piece of work that generations should and will adore. I would love to play this song and share it with my classmates and friends. If you could make this into sheet music, I would be able to share your masterpieces with everyone I know.

Looking forward to your future works! =D

Retarded Windows Song Retarded Windows Song

Rated 5 / 5 stars

Favorited it! Dude, you're a genius!

Well, if Vista was a horrible idea and difficult to load, at least it has adequate sounds. Whoa, how did you do it? 26 of all time? Dude, check your rank. You're #8 now. I'm going to vote 5 for this everyday.

It's not retarded at all. It's brilliant. Looking forward for more of your musical works! So what next? Windows XP sounds?

Blackhole12 responds:

I think its lagging, I'm way below #8 now :<

Oh god no, not winXP sounds xD Thanks though